Why Turning ‘She’s Gotta Have It’ Into a Generic TV Show is Unacceptable

Don’t do it. Please. How did we get here? Hollywood has never been more desperate or despondent with the freedom of imaginative offerings.

Original content no longer clogs the pipeline. It’s now recycled ideas that have been strewn from overworked patchworks of replicas that once served well on their own.

We also have the million dollar franchises that will never run out of fuel — because fans ordain it — and studio execs really care about what the audience has to say when it translates to dollars and cents.

The art of creation no longer holds the weight of intrigue and suspense that was supposed to entice the notion of a new discovery on the horizon.

Talent is regulated to familial dynasties and screenplays have to rely on a formula that negates the very opposite of organic wonder.

We need to see what we’ve seen before through a more viscerally programmed medium.

Television has now become the playground for glorified interpretations of hit flicks that are being forced back into the limelight in the most inappropriate ways.

Lethal Weapon starring Mel Gibson and Danny Glover as LA cops who partner up despite their glaring inconsistencies ruled the box office in the eighties and mid-nineties. The TV show with the same title won’t quite capture exactly why the films garnered that level of notoriety.

And this will ultimately soil the reputation of a franchise that deserves so much more than a carelessly packaged version of the real thing.

The sleeper hit of 2014 — Dear White People certainly provided plenty for us to talk about and its success — despite being devoid of star power — proved that when you think outside the box to get into the box — you can stay there and build a colony.

And now the news of an upcoming TV series that will attempt to woo us with similar slayage is in the works — but the expectations won’t rise to the occasion.

We know it will be whack because nothing so good can endure multiple settings.

This leads me to the recent announcement regarding my favorite film of all time. Spike Lee has had more wins than misses but his bonafide masterpiece and career highlight was unleashed in 1986 — the year he birthed She’s Gotta Have It.

Nola Darling. Sexy, cool and refreshingly collected with healthy skin and a hair cut to die for was primed for fuck sessions orchestrated by her command.

The men adhered to her schedule and Nola accepted her power with relished caution. She could eat her cake and have it too because she wielded enough ammunition to fend off anyone threatening her dominion.

But when the slices got too thin to save for later or distribute for emergency pangs of longing — the only one to comfort Nola was — Nola.

Great story and the perfect backdrop of Brooklyn with the inhabitants of a city that always takes more than its willing to give.

Movie made in heaven — but TV show? Hell no!

Who saw this coming? How could we dream up a scenario that pairs Spike Lee with Netflix — in a bid to reproduce a classic that continues to provide the ink that stamps his wavering approval.

It’s a done deal. There is no way to halt this ill-fated project in the works — even if we chant for its demise every day without fail.

It’s going to be a pathetic shitfest.

No matter how the deliverables collide with nostalgic offerings — Nola Darling and her men-in-waiting won’t survive the curse of greed — seething in the betrayal that honors the victims who disregard cultural opulence in favor of calculated quickies.

Spike Lee sold out. His wife Tonya Lee who serves as producer also gave up the ghost in exchange for something that still remains a mystery.

She’s Gotta Have It saved its purpose when it became public and every now and then when it appears on the small screen — we get the reminder that stories hitting too close too home should be cuddled and preserved for moments of increased mental infatuation.

We can’t convert every sacred tale of orgasmic emancipation at the hands of a scribed heroine into a weekly dud.

If Spike Lee is willing to sell out — yet again — we have to reel it in. His motives are suspect and the characters he created need protection.

I am stepping up to protect the valley of my summer refuge. It’s always her. Challenging anything or anyone that stands in the way of her mission.

We need Nola to survive her abduction which is currently underway.

Only those of you under the familiarity of a disaster in the making — need apply.

Just make sure you relay that this shitfest in the making is unacceptable.

Then give them the screenplay you’ve been pondering for almost two years.

They will love you for it. So will Nola.