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The Top 10 Reasons Why Donald Trump Is The Most Thankful American in America

Thanksgiving is here again!

And while I may be in the minority when it comes to the ability to maintain an optimistic and celebratory stance, at a time when evil White men are dangerously enabling the cowardly White lion, who is mowing down the moral fibers of this ailing nation — there is the annoying realization that the diseased oaf in The White House is undeniably having the time of his life.

While most of us battle the frigidity of the deep freeze that forecasters promise will be epic; here are the top ten reasons why President Trump is the most thankful American in America:

  1. He’s a White man.
  2. He’s a White man who is privileged enough to rely on his Whiteness as the weapon against common decency.
  3. He’s a White a man who can do whatever he wants and get away with it without a stain on his Whiteness; because he’s protected by White men who rely on his ordained dysfunction as proof of their durability, which means this systemic disorder will never be disabled.
  4. He’s a White man who doesn’t have to behave himself because that mandate is optional, since the privilege of being White automatically endears him as a faulty human who is prone to mood swings, and therefore vulnerable to the temptations that dictate his rampant display of deplorableness.
  5. He’s a White man who never has to say “sorry” for anything at all, even the stuff that his non-White counterparts would have to publicly atone for with disgraceful fare, and the assurance that their reputation will forever suffer the sin of practiced offensiveness.
  6. He’s the White man who is ceremoniously feted by those who claim the duty to hold him accountable, but actions depict otherwise; as the non-stop coverage, and the rewards it yields — damningly prove the viable currency of Whiteness in vomit-inducing circumstances that are encouraged to get bleaker.
  7. He’s the White man who can abuse the power he tragically wields by cursing out war heroes, endorsing global dictators with murderous tendencies and bullying the press into a helpless stance based on the over-engagement that he elicits, and how it infuriatingly keeps the asshole in the driver’s seat.
  8. He’s the White man who can freely demean Black women with spiteful insults that are racially-motivated, and meant to recall historical references that his base of White supremacists appreciate and applaud; while members of his shattered party perfect the art of hiding out until the cringe-worthy moments disappear into the growing pile of shit.
  9. He’s the White man who can take credit for outing the GOP as the extended family of bigots; as his public allegiance to White nationalism, and how that very bold move resulted in an increase in popularity — helps to Make America White Again — at the expense of the population that is anything but grateful for the gift of a racist authoritarian as Commander-in-Chief.
  10. Finally, he’s the White man who never had to grow up, and his temper tantrums have been finessed by White people in places of authority, who could easily do to him what they would swiftly exact on a Black man with similar characteristics; but America has an immeasurable love and extra soft spot for White males who are blissfully aware of their immunity to the laws of the land.

And for that, Donald Trump and the White men who made him are extremely thankful.

Written by

Juggling Wordsmith. I have a lot to say!

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